we've been researching and living retirement for about 5 years now and we learned a lot about what works and quite frankly what doesn't work and we you know coached a lot of people and we get a lot of comments on our YouTube channel so there's a lot of people who enter this phase really unprepared and then they just wander around and end up bored and even depressed you know without the right strategies you're missing out on the joys and opportunities that retirement can offer to you so today we're going to give you the top 20 pieces of advice from ourselves but also from so many of our clients who are having a really great time in retirement that they describe as super successful and make sure you stay till the end because we're also going to throw in our top five retirement tips can't wait to get to that yeah exactly listen if you're new here I'm jod and this is my husband Mark now we don't focus on the financial aspects of retirement but really what we do focus on is lifestyle Health relation relationships and so much more we hope you like our videos and if you do please share them with someone you care about and definitely like them as you're on your way down your retirement Journey so let's talk a little bit about our journey for the last 5 years because we don't want you all to think just because we have a YouTube channel that we have it all figured out we do in many regards but I I would say the the one thing that we're doing really well is working at it we do yeah I would say that we work at it every day almost to the point where sometimes you know how you work at something so long that sometimes you're like okay I'm going to take a pause on this every once in a while I'll have to call the pause yeah and and I don't want to give away our five tips but the one thing that you and I have going for us well there's really 10 things but I only want to focus on one now is our communication yeah you know we don't always agree nor do we always get along well we always communicate yeah you know we really do give each other respect the space to have an opinion um and you know we're human beings and living together can have its challenges absolutely but we I think the big thing for us is experimenting we don't always agree we don't always get along but we always reset and regroup and what's what else am I looking to say well sometimes I think we also just do what I said just take a pause right I mean sometimes you have to just kind of step away to go back at it with fresh eyes yeah so you know we keep we do keep track of what's working and what isn't working for us and you know what worked for us for all the years that we were married that we were working may not work for us now so we've had to adapt a few things for sure you know when we were working it was I'm not going to say it was easier but there was so much going on there really was no downtime right now we have downtime and we need to make sure we're we're doing it the right way y so you might be wondering why do you even need to think this Harden retirement well we have people say that to us all the time you know you guys make it sound like it's so much work in retirement that's when you're supposed to have no work right well what we found out is our retirement other people's retirements are successful and they're happy because they spend a little bit of time working on things right now by the way we've got a whole bunch of free downloads but we're going to put a link below to one it's a health and wellness checklist we want you to get that download and use that to kind of reset your health in retirement that's really really important so let's jump into some of the best retirement advice we've heard from RE reies thus far and again stay till the end where we'll do our top five retirement tips okay first thing stay active first thing always what staying active it is it's one of our first things we always say I can't emphasize this enough now we have a new puppy who is in the background is he eating something well just a dresser no he's eating a knob on a dresser maybe you should grab him but staying active it's her uh yeah it's a her so we'll bring her up um you get to see Ruby this but uh staying Physically Active it boosts your mood it boosts your health you know walking walking walking our dog is always helpful but we're both pretty big fans of some regular type of exercise Absolut and you need to do that yep yep and you know we read a great book called outlived by Dr Peter ATA and he talks a lot about exercising being the best medicine for longevity okay you can't lick the microphone all right second thing nutrition you've really got to understand what it is that you put into your mouth you know my mom said that when I was a kid but as we get older you know there are changing nutritional needs that we need to be aware of and you got to have a good balance of fruits vegetables lean proteins and whole grains absolutely and you know you have to also stay hydrated you know you have to limit your intake of sugary or processed foods and definitely make sure that you're Consulting a nutritionist I think or a dietitian even of sorts and make it fun in the kitchen you know explore some new recipes or Cuisines to keep your meals exciting and nutritious yeah you do good with that because you're really our cook I'm really appetizers Ambiance and clean up well we've moved from Strictly meat and potatoes and gravies I I call it comfort food to more of a Mediterranean diet so we don't do much beef we do a lot of chicken we do a lot of fish having fish tonight right um a lot of vegetables and we feel better because of that the exercise and nutrition really makes us feel great absolutely so the next thing is really to just you know our retirees tell us all the time you know continuous and constant learning keeps our brains active and really keeps us sharp and keeps us young yeah and you know retirement offers you the freedom to explore new hobbies or skills or go to the library when was the last time you're in a library you know it's amazing to walk I love walking through bookstores but walk through a library is even more fun because it just massive and there's so many different sections you can get lost in there forever right and you know I think that uh local community centers like uh got down here in Florida they've got all of these nature preserves they just kind of fun to go walks Serenity walks and different things another thing that's really important and the fourth tip today is socializing you really got to make sure you're getting out and making new connections there are a lot of people in the same boat that you're in right that want to meet new people down here in Florida we're just really getting so much better at putting ourselves out there Y where you can volunteer join a club um I and it's not that hard you know I think we make socialization as we age a lot harder than it really needs to be it's like almost like we build up these walls around how am I going to get invited or who am I going to know or what am I going to say and you know really it's just a matter of putting yourself out there and being you I mean you you are very interesting and what we always tell our kids is it's important to be both interesting when you're socializing and interested so you know have your battery of questions kind of lined up that you're going to you know say to people when you're in Social settings a lot a lot of it is easier than you think so that's all about meeting new people and networking so to speak uh the other thing the fifth tip is nurturing your current relationships we get that a lot from our retirees what's that that need to do this once they are retire I mean whether it's your children or your old colleagues at work or your relatives or high school friends or college friends these are people that at one point in your life were probably pretty close to you will reach out and find out what they're doing look for them on Facebook or whatever but don't be afraid they're probably wondering if they're retired as well gosh I I wonder where my high school friends are and when you call them I guarantee you they're going to be like oh my gosh I can't believe it just called and you have the most wonderful conversation so I also think that in the nurturing relationship bucket Mark I I also think it's a time where you can really sit back and address any unresolved conflicts that you might have whether that's with family or old friends or you know old neighbors or colleagues you know it's a good time to be able to address all of that for sure okay um staying financially Savvy lot of the lot of our clients and ourselves and people leave comments that you know how much money can I spend spend should I downsize or rent when should I take Social Security or my pension you know we have a great tool that we um came in contact with through new retirement and it's actually a um a portal where you can connect all your bank accounts and it actually pulls everything and it shows how much you're spending it shows you what might happen if you downst it's a really cool too it's it's like a scenario plan yeah so we'll put that down below but these are all questions that people have you need to get the answers so either a financial planner or um your accountant or using this tool but you know having a regular budget can be helpful because you kind of know how much you can spend right um I think the other thing that we see a lot of because we get it all the time too is being really careful about scams oh I know you know this thing where people call up and say that uh it's it's an email and or they'll say is this Mark Rollins and you say yes and then they have your yes there so there's a lot of those things that are happening good financial adviser and really understanding your finances is really important okay the next thing I would say and and I didn't do this as much during my career but I've really taken this on um and with some advice from our retirees is prioritizing your mental health your mental health and wellness is so important it's critical and almost as crucial as your physical health right uhoh Ruby's getting adventurous Ruby's getting out of hand um you know meditation I talk about meditation a lot lot I talk about journeying a lot and you know five five or six years ago I started meditating and if you asked me the day before I was meditating would I ever do it I would I would have said no yeah but it really is a lifesaver now it really helps me every morning to kind of get myself set for the day journaling gets my ideas and my feelings out on a piece of paper it really has helped me tremendously be more calm and in the moment for whatever comes our way absolutely and you know what I I remember you and I remember you the day before you started and and you really that's a true statement you never would have done it if if you didn't you know kind of feel like you had to do it at that point okay the next thing I would say is um you know our retirees these days are really embracing technology you know it offers a great tool to stay connected and informed and even entertained and then there's you know the platforms like Zoom or Skype that allow you to do virtual meetups with family family members we just yesterday gave our grandson Luca his fifth birthday present oh yeah via Zoom they're in California they're in California and we're here in Florida and we had the present all set it was all ready you know we had it all kind of concealed his eyes were covered and um that was really the only way we were able to celebrate so I think it was good that we were able to do that and they're able to do it you know back with us I mean I think Luka could zoom or Skype us probably without his parents well on the way to school a lot in the morning uh Jonathan will give Luca his phone and luuka and I will have a conversation on the way to school which is fun so there's um there's a lot you can do with technology and I I find that when people are struggling with technology they're struggling with life so really investing some time and learning how to use your phone right learning how to use your computer it really is important I think the next you know the next thing our retirees tell us is you know you know travel and explore you know traveling provides such EXP exposure to new cultures you know I know we've got a safari coming up at the end of next year we're both a little nervous about um but new cultures new foods new experiences and even some local trips some stations but going to the next town over I know I had a hard time saying that the other day but the next town over can be really fun and it keeps you busy so you can plan a trip you can research trips we we've we've now seen recently there's a lot of travel agents that specialize in trips for solo not solos solo retirees or solo people individual people so you go on a vacation with 10 people who are all there on their own right and you know the travel agent does a pretty good job we hear of making sure that you're all the same um you know you're you're going to the same place for the same reason and that you'll pretty much get along so that's great so more advice from our um retirees that we've been kind of investigating and calculating this is always a favorite re-evaluate your living situation and you know what I mean by that is you know consider your proximity to you know family to friends to Health Care Facilities to your doctors to your favorite recreational areas you know re-evaluate if where you are here today is where you really want to be or need to be as you move through your retirement yeah I think that's really important because there are so many options for you today to live and again it's not just about downsizing which I think we're going to talk about in a minute but it's really where do you live and how are you living we we always talk about wanting to end up as we get older being there one of our kids and we have six it's just hard but they haven't really we're not necessarily on the same page on this one what do you mean well I mean I think it would be great but I like who do you pick how do you pick what do you do I I'm not going to say it on here but I know who I'm going to pick okay I want to be taken care of okay I know who she is oops did I say that okay so the the next thing is downsizing or rightsizing your home so this has Financial connotations but it also has a tremendous amount of um psychological stumbling blocks that you need to get over in order to even think about downsizing and the first place to start instead of just saying I don't want to talk about it with your partner you have to talk about it I think that's really the first thing we have a lot of people who are frustrated with this topic because they're spouse or partner don't want to talk about it well well the retirees that we spoke to for this video said you know this is a scary and dangerous topic right downsizing you know decluttering is a little bit easier than downsizing downsizing means you're thinking of making a big move right and if you're both not on the same page it becomes divisive so you know the retirees uh that we talked to said this is good advice to start to bring up early in your retirement really planning the seeds you know where do you stand on on this you know is simplifying something that's going to lead to less stress or are you the house that everyone comes to and and we've done and that's fine too we've done uh several videos on this topic of downsizing there's another one that says if downsizing isn't right for you some things that you can do really the process here is to simplify your life you're now in a phase of your life where you've got more free time you can travel so will Trading houses up or down make your life simple right so right and it's you know it's a therapeutic process and speaking of a therapeutic process the next thing that everyone says helps them so much is beginning the process of decluttering right and that oh my gosh we we try to declutter all the time it gives you mental Clarity it makes your home safer and there's so many emotional but what's so funny I'm laughing because if we try to declutter all the time where's the Clutter coming from I don't well yeah the first thing is to stop buying stuff right yeah exactly because you know take the Amazon app off of your phone because you know when you declutter you know and then you declutter again and again you got to start saying to yourself where is it all coming from well I I mean you can start with a closet you can start with a dresser and you know there's a lot of gems inside your closet and your dresser that other people can use if you're not using I mean if you're not if you haven't worn a c outfit for 2 years get rid of it yeah you're never going to wear it again the other thing is when you when you take a look at an item in your closet if you wouldn't buy that new today get rid of it right you know so you know you don't need your suits anymore your work clothes if you've retired so decluttering can really be fun we did we've done a lot of videos on that too you know this next um item a lot of our retirees really felt uh strongly about and and that is to document your legacy you know sharing your life stories is such a gift to all the future Generations in your world you know writing or recording or even creating digital albums you know can be great methods of documenting your legacy and this is the one thread I think that I heard that just everyone spoke about with passion there's a good friend of mine um who is a a grandmother she's got three children and five grand grandchilden and she writes a letter I think she writes two letters a year to each grandchild every year she's been doing that since the kids were born and she's telling them stories she's sharing with them a little bit about her um her preferences or political background uh you know how she feels about certain current events that are going on right now it's really going to be an amazing gift to give to these kids to be able to have a letter from their grandma mother from 20 years ago about some current event that was happening and how it's making her feel so it really is a neat project that she's done yep well you just saw Ruby or maybe you did but adopting a pet you know it gives this is controversial with retirees actually okay you know because and I didn't mean to interrupt you I know I'm going to get hit with comments on stop interrupting it's typically me that interrupts you that's what the comments say but um you know adopting a pet or rescuing a pet or somehow putting that type of love and companionship into your life gives you so much the flip side and I guess where I'd say it becomes controversial is you have to be you know ready for it you have to have you know the financial wherewithal to handle it you have to have the bandwidth to handle the training the potty training the dog walking you have to have good physical activity and if you don't it's going to help you get there but you have to be ready for it and this one just kind of was like uh probably 7 25 a was interesting for us though we've had two dogs together before we had sugar um and we had little Max and we just got the dogs and we just brought them up the way we wanted to well because we were working we were still so now we have Ruby for three days and I said to jod why don't we do this differently why don't we find some YouTube channels and learn how to really train a dog well it's actually been really exciting for us because we're learning some things we never knew right and I think it's been really helpful for us and for little Ruby and for rucious yeah so having a Pet's great it well it's works for us and again it was kind of a controversial well there is a lot of love that comes back yep and there's just a lot of anxiety that comes with the love so all right the 15th tip you could join a club or start a club right so coffee uh with uh so for a man get one buddy have coffee once once a week bringing have him bring a guest and you bring a guest get up to like 10 people and have weekly coffee tell stories I I do that all the time and I love it so it's it's a really fun way to well let me say this it's important Jody and I have a business we're married we have kids we do a lot together but we do a fair amount apart too so I think that for everyone in retirement if you're solo you're solo but if you're a couple you got to have your own stuff yeah you got to have your own club you got to have your own group yep um you know the next thing is to seek out mentorship opportunities you know um again our retirees had a wealth of professional and life experiences and there's so much that they could share with younger Generations that they would engage in really meaningful guided conversations that helped build multigenerational connections for them and again they got pretty charged up about seek seeking out these opportunities you know Mark and I did that at the University of Hartford in one of the business classes where we kind of did a guest professorship for a day and then we actually took applications for um for students to mentor and it was a really fun year for us well the thing there's a couple things that happen first of all you're helping someone else but you feel fulfilled you know you feel like you have a sense of purpose uh by guiding others and the other thing is I'm going to go guide is get getting mentored by someone who's younger than you I mean I have two mentors we kind of Mentor each other one is my son and one is another young professional that I know but but I actually can learn a lot from them they have a different outlook on business they have a different outlook on life and it really has been helpful to me for sure so that that's been fun yeah it has sorry I had to step away um this was I thought an interesting one and this came from a a a pocket of our um friends and retirees that wanted to engage in artistic Pursuits um I would put myself in this area I haven't done it yet but exploring different art forums and painting and pottery you know our neighbor across the street Jen she does that every year whenever she gets down to Florida she joins last last year was Pottery this year it's painting drawing it's drawing drawing she joins um art classes and workshops and goes to the local community center and she loves it and that's something I think I would like to do cuz I don't do much for my artistic side but it gives you also um uh Arts a form of expression and emotional release and if you're into that at all it really is kind of fun to do that I mean this in a way what we're doing is Artistic Pursuits I mean we're shooting video and we're you know um you know building a little business but it it's uh it's fun I would I wouldn't say it's a hobby but we've had to learn so much so it's been kind of cool y on the other thing and we just did a Facebook live on this yesterday is um staying updated with current events you know we we did a a Facebook live yesterday in our in our community uh do you consume the news or is the news consuming you right so really finding a way to get good solid news we think is important I mean trying to find reputable news sources or magazines is really helpful versus getting caught up in what everyone calls the fake news if you will but you know uh get involved with Community discussions or forums talk to friends don't be so judgmental when someone has a certain opinion on a news article but really finding a balance there because it is important to stay up to date it is I believe it really is important to stay up to date but like you said it's also can be all consuming we do have some retirees that watch the news Chann channels and you can watch the news channels now 24 hours a day so uh we do have some folks that are doing that which isn't probably the healthiest the next one is well before you do that one of the what's that I interrupted you I get a good comment um we stepped away we have stepped away from watching the news in a in a big way so we'll watch the evening news for I don't know 35 minutes we watch some things on um well Evan your daughter told us to watch NPR well listen that's a podcast it's a podcast so we we we get some news that way but um staying informed about local events or Community changes we kind of stepped away from that we jumped back in you found out about this great concert taking place and then you signed up for it and it was full yeah I mean literally the day I saw it which means it probably was out there before yeah so I think the whole idea of current events is really important things happening in your community so I didn't mean to interrupt you but I didn't want to forget that okay I think the next thing that we heard a lot about from everybody was planning regular family events or Gatherings you know now you have the time to organize events and birthdays and anniversaries and really start to create traditional Traditions like annual family picnics or you know um different things you could do with grandchildren either in groups or select one at a time I mean that's really something fun that you can um really jump into I think yeah we have Thanksgiving um in Florida this Thanksgiving couple weeks couple weeks and we've got five of our six kids coming with their partners and um the grandkids are not going to make it but we can't wait for that and we make it special and we make it a lot of fun and they all have their favorite food here and little gifts and we take a lot of pictures so that we can have really good memories for um for the future um you know investing in self-care is really really important a lot of people don't take time to do that you what it shouldn't have been number 20 it shouldn't have been last no it shouldn't it really shouldn't because now is the time you can dedicate for relaxation and meditation and deep breathing and different things like that if you can afford to get a massage once in a while um you know do yoga on the beach you got to get your health checkups I I know I um I think we'll leave a link below we have a a free yeah Health checkup worksheet is really great so you can download that we'll put that in the comments below but you know you want to engage in activities that stimulate your mind puzzles games right you have to get adequate sleep and rest we have the aura ring so we track our sleep the first thing we talk about in the morning is well just how you do what are your numbers you guys have been patient our top five retirement tips number one you have to have a plan y you need a short long-term plan you need 5 10 15 20 years or more out you know my my plan is to be physically independent at the age of 90 you You' heard me say that before so that is what drives me to get up and exercise every single day and we start each day with a plan that's a good segue to the second big tip exercise exercise exercise exercise exercise it's the number one thing that we can do for ourselves to be healthy and if you're not exercising now keep it simple walk out the front door walk 10 minutes one way and come back and do that for 5 days and then go 15 minutes and then do 20 minutes for a week so you got to do that the third top tip is you've got to build a community of people you've whether it's your family you reach out to whether it's Friends new friends neighbors re-engaging with old work friends number three is you've got to build community and the fourth tip would be healthy habits really review your habits you know think about can you limit your alcohol can you stop any bad habits I mean you stopped cigar smoking you pretty much eliminated chocolate chip cookies pretty much eliminated what do you mean pretty much you bought them yesterday and I haven't had one yet and you're going to throw them out I'm having them and you know keeping ahead of better nutrition you know eliminating your bad foods and making sure you're eating what makes you feel good I was thinking about this this morning healthy habits or food alcohol whatever it is I drink very little now so if you can try going for two weeks let's just say two weeks no alcohol uh change your nutritions try to eat healthy try to get good sleep it's amazing how much sleep you can get when you don't have any alcohol yes try it for two weeks see how you feel just see if you feel any different because that's what's happened to me if I have a glass of wine I feel like crap the next day I've gotten so used to not having one glass yeah yeah but but anyway all right the the fifth thing is to give back you know volunteer start or get a dog Ruby really like that one volunteer or start a company you know during our career we got fulfillment out of our job but volunteering is a great way to replace that right um and if you're married in a relationship have fun have fun with each other look how much fun we're having and doing this right sorry about flexible with each other you know she's brand new we run into trouble here at times together as a couple but try to find ways to have fun yes some of this was ser ious and it can affect your quality of life and other things are just downright important but all of it is to make this next phase of Life exciting and fun so we hope you enjoyed this and if you did this next video top tips for living longer in retirement on that video we talk not only about living longer but almost as important as living healthier so watch this one nextRead More
so what we created for you is a three-part series that we're about to release today is five to ten years prior to retirement and in the future you'll see the one to five years and then that 12 month out when it's go time today is all about the transition into retirement you know when you think of the word retirement sometimes you think of things like getting old being useless or sitting on a beach drinking pina colada that sounds a little up day long sometimes you think about golf three days a week or treating every day like a saturday but the reality is it's a very hard transition going through this transition with some planning effort habits and routines that serve you will definitely yield amazing results and the opposite if you leave it to chance and just show up it can be disastrous you could find yourself feeling rudderless with really no idea what to do every day so what we created for you is a three-part series that we're about to release today is five to ten years prior to retirement and in the future you'll see the one to five years and then that 12 month out when it's go time you know we're going to give you four key strategies that you can use right now to ensure success again i know you're 10 or 5 years out but it's really important so we're going to give you those strategies and then at the end of this video we're going to give you five action steps that you must implement right now now you know mark and i have learned a lot over the past 13 years and we've had our fair share of failures successes we have a list of things we would do differently and a very long list of things we've learned and you know we want to better prepare you for this amazing transformation so why don't we begin with the first strategy and the first one you'll be familiar with it's planning don't roll your eyes yeah you know people say why would i have to plan for my retirement well here's the thing you've had a long career i'm sure my career was 38 years i planned every day every week every month every quarter every year every five years so we're all used to planning and the correlation is this phase can last 30 years so why would you not plan a good place to start would be to get a journal and we're going to talk more about journaling in the next episode the next series one to five years out because it's important so the second key strategy would be understanding the risks and how to deal with them so you might say to yourself what risks are there in retirement and i'll tell you we've done research on the big three the first is loss of identity you no longer have your ceo card or your president card or your head of sales card or your office or your email or your team yeah or your branding you know you walk into a room and there's jody she's svp of chubb blah blah blah that goes away so you do lose your identity the second of the big three of risks is your loss of community all of your friends and your clients and your situational friendships your restaurants you went to the maitre d's you knew the hotels you frequented at events you know you lose that community and that's a big deficit right and the third one the third risk of entering retirement or when you enter retirement is you're going to get 40 or more new free hours that come your way which feels liberating it does feel liberating but you have to figure out what to do with them we have a great video youtube we did on time affluence in retirement so we can put that link down below as well but the third strategy after starting to get familiar with the risks is starting to think about a vision for this phase and if you've been following us for a while you know we talk a lot about five pillars physical wellness mental wellness relationships spouse partner relationships and wisdom sharing and the sixth one that we've been really batting around which isn't in our vernacular right now but it's really the community and how to build a community for yourself during this space because you don't want to do this alone so five to ten years out we want you to think about the pillars we want you to think about where you are with each of the pillars where are you with your physical health your mental wellness you know where are you with your relationships and so on now's the time to start the thought process and spend the next five or ten years thinking about them making them part of who you are the fourth strategy is to start thinking about habits and routines and really drill down on what is serving you well what are you needing to quit what are some new habits that you might want to pull into your retirement and into this next phase of life and your favorite morning routine you know my morning routine our morning routine during our career get up have a cup of coffee watch a little news do as many emails as we could before we could get to work catch up on all of that i was going to say there was making lunches and finding soccer outfits but then jumping in the car and going to work right you know your first day at home that first monday when you're sitting there you don't have that you're might be empty nesters like we were so you look across from each other so you want to start thinking about your morning routine now and maybe start to change it and you also want to kind of take stock of the habits and routines that you have now and how are they going to translate into retirement and i'll give you an example a habit i had when i was going out to dinner entertaining clients was well first you sit down and you order a bottle of wine if i did that habit every time i went out to dinner during retirement i'd be drinking an awful lot of wine is that a habit that i want to pull into the next 30 years or save it for special well we should pull that in for the first six months that falls under the failure another category yeah it was a failure but anyway so if you implement work on these four strategies for the next you know five years you're going to start to get some clarity on retirement what should i worry about what am i excited about what's it going to look like and you're going to have comfort in knowing more about what's out there than maybe you do now you'll also get a higher sense of what success is going to look like for you that's a big one individually for the next 30 years and you know the really big one is it will help you hone and drill down on what will your purpose be yeah and your passion purpose and passion we hear those words used all the time yeah and right now during your career if you're still in it you've got purpose and you might have passion around your job but passion in retirement where's that going to live for you and then the other thing that comes out of doing all of this work is being in control of your life you don't want to just let everything happen between now and the day you walk out the door without being proactive with everything that you do and you know it takes courage to be in control of your life it takes courage to be in control of your own calendar and your own day and you have 30 years to work that out so listen if you're getting value out of this please share give it a thumbs up and copy the link below and share it with your friends so let's do the five action steps five action steps that you should do now the first thing meet and hire a financial planner you know we can't emphasize this enough and even if you're a smart financial person and you manage your stocks and all of that it's so good to have an outside independent third party help look at your benefits your pension your 401k um and that's not us it's not us no no we don't do anything in this area we have a financial planner and it just allows us to know that that is clear and it also you get to know do you have enough money to retire that's always important what's your date right what date do you have in mind yeah because you never think you have enough money right but the financial plan will help you if you're going to live this way you have plenty of money the second action step if you're married or you have a partner i cannot stress enough communication what is your combined vision you can't wait till the day after you walk out of your office to start to convey what that is to your partner or spouse and i'll yeah i'll tell you this is an area where many couples fail big time they both had jobs they both were great all they spent their weekends together and nights but all of a sudden now they're together all day long and the wife has one vision and the husband has another and it's and actually on any one of the pillars yeah they could have different visions on physical wellness or relationships or you know anything that has to do with retirement so the key is start talking about it now right you don't want to wait until you're home the first day after retirement to start figuring out what your vision's going to be now the third one is to think about how you're going to show up in the five pillars we mentioned so what do i mean by showing up how are you going to enter retirement physically right mentally with your relationships intact or not you know how are you going to show up with your spouse partner you have to make a concerted effort to show up in the right way and the fourth step call some of your retired friends see what they're just actually fun it is fun i remember going down to florida to play golf with my buddies and the older guys from our club were there and what's it like what do you do and well every day is like a saturday but you know i could see they really weren't that healthy not all of them were were doing what what i thought made sense but i just figured that's what happens and ask him some tough questions yeah what do you love about it what are your lows like what are your highs like you know have you built a community of like-minded people and if you have how did you do it how did you figure out where to live all of those things but they're a great resource for you and the fifth step start having a discussion about downsizing or we could call it right sizing this is another area where families run into trouble so just start imagining what life could be if you've got the big five family house with a five bedroom house for all the kids full bathrooms and all that you know as they start to leave the nest which you want them to do do you really need a house that big and maybe you do but the idea here is to decide do you want to continue to have that large house and if the decision is yes then that's good right but not knowing is bad right one of the things we did as we traveled around we uh that's why how we ended up in in connecticut we came here for summers on our boat and we loved it and so we decided to build a house yeah but we did a lot of searching we did a lot of googling we did a lot of reading we did a lot of house tours we looked at a lot of different communities and you will find the one that's right for you but i would start early again the day after you leave your corporate career or your business is not the time to so those are five steps that we hope you do right now we're going to give you three books to read speaking of learning that are critical we think to read at any time prior than retiring to retiring one is second mountain by david brooks the second is the way of transition by william bridges and one of my favorites is the five love languages by gary chapman it's just a great communication book and we'll put those links down below great reads you know today we've shared some ideas and some strategies and some steps to help you begin this journey but again i can't emphasize enough don't wait even if you're 10 years out start thinking now and here's advice from me who's really bad at challenging conversations don't put them off sit down find a way to have an open dialogue and just you know be kind to each other and listen to each other because everyone has an opinion and also don't forget to watch the other two parts that will be behind this and with some effort and some planning and some real action you can enter this phase with a whole successful strategy laid out if you enjoyed this please share with your friends and subscribe by clicking the subscribe button below and don't forget to join our free facebook community the link is in the notes below as well thanks for listening and we look forward to being with you againRead More
the first year of retirement isn't always the dreamy Escape many people imagine no it's not maybe one of the most significant transitions in your life it was for us and it probably is going to be for you and that's because it's filled with all the unexpected challenges roadblocks and adjustments you have to make in this new pH and I think it's really important to understand that if you fail to navigate this first year you might find yourself questioning your entire decision to retire and today we're going to give you some strategies to feel empowered to overcome any of the struggles you might find do we ever feel like we made a mistake and we should still be working I do sometimes do you I do back in your corporate life I oh my good I do I know but listen and I'm sure some people do maybe but if you're new here I'm Mark Rollins and this is my wife Jody Rollins we don't focus on the financial aspects of retirement but rather life lifestyle Health relationships and more and we're so happy you're here today and it really would be helpful to us if you could share this video with anyone else that you know or care about that's in their retirement Journey too and you know join our free Facebook community at retirement transformed we go live each week and offer guidance support strategies to make this chapter the best it can be so before we jump in I want to remind you that this first year of retirement really sets the foundation for all the future years to come so you want to be able to equip yourself with the knowledge that you need you want to stay proactive and embrace this new Journey with a lot of confidence you know we know dozens of people who are floundering in this first year of retirement and it's really not pretty to watch I was at a bridal shower this past weekend and a woman across the table from me said um you know I heard her talking to someone else and she said I'm terrified and I thought oo this will be an interesting conversation we're at a bridal shower I'm not sure what there is to be terrified about but she's a teacher and this is her last year so in June she's done done after 35 years of teaching the third grade and she said I'm I'm literally terrified I don't know where to start that is scary and it it's scary for everyone I'm not saying it's scarier for a teacher or doctor whatever but if this is all you've known and you know teachers have a special kind of thing they they work from the middle of August through the end of June and then I have the summer off right and you do that for 30 40 years right and it's a routine that you're comfortable with and you get enjoy it you get fulfillment right what do you how do you feel that so the first year is really really important to get that right my dad screwed it up big time I mean he without a doubt he's a good example of someone who made a lot of mistakes in his first year and I you know I I tell people that retirement actually killed my dad because he just didn't know how to get through this first year and set himself off in a spiral which yeah he was he was unprepared and a lot of people do enter this phase of their life maybe prepared financially but unprepared emotionally and with all of the kind of red flags that start to come their way you know your dad really just couldn't reinvent himself he lived in the used to world yeah it was it was bad but you know we do know plenty of people who think this phase is easy and for some people they actually make the transition smoothly but for others like my dad you know like I said it can actually kill you if you don't really get it right so we should cut the mystery and jump into what people really struggle with yeah and I think the first thing we see in people that we know and clients that we have and talks that we have given as well as the research that we do is this major loss of identity that hits you probably a week or two after you retire ire yeah and for a long time whether you're a teacher or a doctor or a lawyer or an insurance agent or a corporate executive we derived a lot of our selfworth from our job roles right I mean that's just the way it was and it you know when you first got out of college and started your job it was one thing but by the time you ended up you were at a much higher very senior level in your company and that was your identity and when that identity no longer exists you really find yourself in a strange danger zone right you know without an identity in retirement you can have feelings of worthlessness and and really have a hard time finding your purpose and passion so it's really a reinvention of source so in your first year this is going to happen you're going to lose your identity and you really need to start thinking about creating a new one you don't want to go too long like my dad did and spend the next 10 years holding on to or feeling sad about losing your identity you want to make a new one it's really really important now the other thing that people struggle with in the first year of retirement is financial concerns and that's normal right because you're moving from a time in your life when you have a steady paycheck or an expense account or whatever it might be health insurance all of that is just coming at you automatically yeah and then it stops it does stop and then you have your nest egg and Market volatility can add to your stress you know if you've planned properly up to that moment but then have to make different financial decisions moving forward maybe riskier or less risky Investments depending on you know how you're advised you find yourself in a little bit of a budgeting process that becomes really crucial to how you're going to live this first year well it's a good point and we spend 30 40 Years of our life accumulating assets right just adding to it adding to it adding to it 401 okay whatever it might be but then that stops and now you go into this new phase called uh decumulation where you're actually taking your savings and your assets and living on that and that is mentally is a really hard financial concern so in the first year you've really got to make sure that you figure that out and get comfortable with it and have a good plan a good financial plan or you know really nail your financials yeah really and then you know we hear a lot from people you know that they're bored they're bored in retirement you know they don't really have a routine that they can stick to and they really struggle that first year getting away from you know the the structure and accountability that they had with their work days just this morning I was down watching the sun come up and I ran into my friend who retired a year ago and he keeps himself busy but you know I was checking with him and say how's it going cuz it's it's okay it's okay how's your you know how's your new uh career that you're doing he's a he's a writer now and he's writing he said well it's interesting you know I watch you guys on YouTube and you talk a lot about um having routines and I find that it's easier not having a routine which it is but then he doesn't do what he wants to do which frankly is harder if you don't have some routines built in and some plans for your day in the first year of retirement you're going to get used to not having routines you're going to get used to not getting things done and you're not going to like it you just are not going to like it so I think that it's easier to have routines maybe harder to get moving in that direction but once you have them your life becomes so much easier I don't know how you think about no I I agree with you I do know we get a lot of push back on people who want to just abandon routine because they've lived 35 or 40 years in a strict routine and I really advise people I think it's okay to let it go for a little while but not too long so that you know as they say the proverbial horse is out of the barn and now you can't get it back you wake up every day what am I going to do today that is not a good position to be in for a whole year for sure now the other thing that you can struggle with and you might struggle with right out of the box when you leave your career is social isolation I know for me I had you know 80 people working in my company I was the CEO and I had great relationship with these people and it was kind of like Fridays were what are you going to do this weekend what's going to happen Mondays were how was your weekend what did you do how are the kids how are the grandkids all of this stops right and then it's just you and me I really I really it's important to remember that um you know those relationships that you had at work even extending out to you know I knew a lot of you know my co-worker spouses and their children and I watch them grow and go through college you know you have that longevity of your story your relationship story with these folks and some of them you will bring with you but a lot of them get kind of left behind in the situational kind of friendship bucket um so the big message here is you need to is to replace it you've got to find Community whether it's joining a health club or you know we do pickle ball we talk about that a lot going back to church or religious institution Social Clubs community centers Gym classes gym classes reaching out to your friends make a list of all your friends and start contacting them because you don't want to struggle with social isolation in your first year it's really going to bring you down you know and the fourth thing that we really wanted to talk about was your health and physical activity because I know we did this when we retired you know we were like you know we're just going to go ahead and relax and eat and drink and just sleep late and you know we got a little sluggish there for a while and it wasn't healthy for us and we did course correct and um you know not saying seven days a week you know 30 days out of the month we're always on track we do stay on the health and wellness you know Mission because as you age health challenges come your way it just happens well the other big thing that you could find yourself struggling with is when you first retire in your first year depending upon your circumstances with your partner in in this case jod and I as a married couple that relationship can struggle because we both had work we had our careers we had time at home but every all the Dynamics change when both of you now are home all day long and Frank of this business for us is really helpful because it gives us something to do together but we also do a lot of things on our own we do and and you know while the business is helpful it adds stress and boundaries become even more important I think so if you're starting a business in retirement which we should maybe do a series on that we are we definitely are because there is some Milestones that we uncovered well the other thing that people struggle with in the first year is getting used to setting goals like you said a lot of people say gosh you guys do all this planning and stuff but you need to if you don't set some goals for yourself because you were used to that during your career right you set work rated Milestones um you might find yourself without goals a little bit aimless and at least having personal goals on your physical or whatever it might be yeah I think the big difference with goals is now you have a chance to hold yourself accountable and your goals can be aimed at things that you're really interested in right and then if you're really interested in for example I've been trying to I've been practicing I don't know that I'll ever end the practice but you know different things in yoga and I set goals for for myself no one else is holding me accountable I mean you would have no idea no I but you come home and you tell me about the new stances like the the the one-legged chicken is that one of the things it is not one but we'll do a whole another yoga series I guess well I think again having goals is really important and you know just a a couple more things your emotional well-being it's easy to get in this first year and all of a sudden find yourself sad and down and cre uh you know that stuff will will creep into your life if you're not doing everything we said you know what's funny about this this emotional well-being one because I'm so sad all we actually had a little bit of a tussle this morning you think and sometimes I wonder if in retirement you have more time to think about things mhm and you know maybe you create a mountain out of a mole hill you think no no no what is this I didn't do that yes you did my finger never you're the one that built this huge mountain this morning out of a mole hill so you know I wonder if this is something to really focus on you know you know recognize emotions that you have and consider even you know seeking some counsel on it so now I need a therapist for our relationship this this whole first year of retirement can be very very difficult without a doubt definitely it's meant to be fun and exciting so we don't want to find ourselves in a rut and unsure what to do next yeah I mean trust us when it when we tell you if you get into some good rhythm in your first year the rest of your retirement can become all that you dreamed of like our retirement right that's so funny we hope you enjoyed this video and if you did this next one a happy retirement is in your control we talk about how to bring healthy habits into your life so that you can flourish in retirement so watch this one nextRead More
because there are many people who leave retirement with a huge sense of relief and excitement you have your life back maybe they were shocked when a month or six months or a year or even longer went by and they finally hit a wall for some it creeps up sooner and others it hits later and harder and that you get that feeling of okay so so now what or the feeling like everything feels a little out of control although I'm bored which is kind of a strange juxtaposition today we want to focus on how to prevent boredom in this phase of life boredom is the silent killer that can end your retirement way too soon if you begin to let the days unfold with Lila or no planning you're going to find yourself with idle time and that can lead down a path of self-destruction or at a minimum feel lost and a little scared about what the next 30 years of your life will more and there is boredom leads to loneliness which leads to a list of chronic illnesses such as heart disease anxiety depression and more today we're going to give you some easy Surefire steps to make sure this doesn't happen to you and you're going to finish this video knowing that what you can expect and make a plan to avoid this largest retirement Challenge and stay to the end where we're going to give you three easy steps to bounce back if you feel bored but before we go any further we want to introduce ourselves my name is Mark Rollins and I'm Jody Rollins and we started retirement transformed not only for us but also for you and the 10 000 people turning 65 every day now we don't focus on the financial aspects of retirement but rather lifestyle Health relationships and more if you're new here please hit the Subscribe button and also the notification button so you'll get notified when our videos come out all right let's get into it during your career or if you are a stay-at-home uh mom or dad you were busy right 40 to 60 hours a week and you had a built-in schedule you did if you had children then that was your schedule running them from place to place organizing being involved and you had routines and you had routines that were commonplace maybe you got up at six there was coffee you checked emails maybe had breakfast you did a little exercise that was what our morning was like but it was just automatic we didn't even think about it we had to do that right and then at night at night we would uh come home uh open a bottle of wine cook some dinner and put another bottle have another bottle of wine watch some TV and almost busy Beyond busy in fact we made busy a thing in our house yeah during the week it was it was sort of Controlled Chaos yeah so sometimes it was just chaos weekends for us was rest catching up doing chores doing laundry going dry cleaners having fun with friends but then and they landed that's right you land in retirement and there's this huge relief that now you're free to commit and do whatever you want to do without a schedule and you're free from your from you're free from being Tethered to your career with all of those responsibilities and time commitments that's right and it opens up I remember our first Monday after retirement we retired at the end of 2018 on a Friday at three in the afternoon we walked out of the office with our boxes with our boxes and I remember that Monday the weekend was kind of cool but I remember Monday we still got up at six because our bodies were used to it we still had the coffee we still watched the news but then we had more coffee more news and we said hey we've never really been able to watch the morning shows let's do that all of a sudden it was 10 30 and we're looking at each other like now what do we do well and then if you think about it on that Monday where the blues were just starting to sink in we decided to shower and go out for lunch right and what we didn't really click into was most restaurants were closed on Mondays that we would go to so we came home when we made a list of chores we needed to do around the house well wait a second what we were going to do you made a list of chores I needed to do around the house which wasn't really fair but that's not true you wanted to keep me busy well and then Mark will say things like let's go to Home Depot and before I know it we're at like nine other stops and we finally get to Home Depot well we also decided let's start a Netflix series which we had never really gotten into no so all of a sudden it's six o'clock in the afternoon and we hadn't done anything other than made a list went to Home Depot watched three hours of TV and now it's time to cook dinner and then before we knew it Tuesday looked like that Wednesday looked like that Thursday looked like that and Bam there we are with a board retirement and that was embarrassing to say boredom had set in and we we didn't even want to say to each other but there it was right it was there so we got to work we did we dug ourselves out of that feeling and invested some real time in figuring out how would we fill our days you know maybe you had a different experience because there are many people who leave retirement with a huge sense of relief and excitement you have your life back maybe they were shocked when a month or six months or a year or even longer went by and they finally hit a wall for some it creeps up sooner and others it hits later and harder and that you get that feeling of okay so so now what or the feeling like everything feels a little out of control although I'm bored which is kind of a strange juxtaposition today we want to focus on how to prevent boredom in this phase of life so the first thing you need to do is you need to do some planning now I know I know what you're thinking and you've heard us say this before you've heard us say this before but there's no way you went through a 30 or 40 year career without planning so you need to plan in retirement too because you want to plan on how to fill this new found 40 plus hours of free time that come your way and it's going to guarantee you have at least one activity each day to look forward to you know it's also going to open up you know opportunity for you to make some commitments yes you know we had a client Deb who ended up making a commitment to her College roommates after she retired that she was going to do 52 new things a year that was one new thing every week for a year sometimes alone sometimes with her friends but that's the other thing about this phase book sometime with your friends go to a gym play golf with a friend just go have a cup of coffee or carve out time for your partner Jody and I carve out a lot of time during the week for each other and I would say also especially as a prior recovering working executive mom workaholic maybe you know carve some time out for just yourself what is it that you want to do but again by planning you're going to open up your calendar and you're going to be able to make these commitments so morning time yeah our coffee we sit and chat no TV we just it's funny because we watch we did the whole thing in the beginning with the Netflix series and binging we've really stepped away from TV we don't do it that much if it's a rainy day and we get the urge maybe but our coffee time is pretty sacred I think that's important it is and you know we don't even really turn on the news anymore because there's so many ways that we get news right so news comes at us through our phones and our laptops and you know YouTube and all these other people besides the planning that we do when we're having coffee we just have nice conversations we chat about the kids and things we're going to do or dinner plans or opportunities each of us may have been given for the week and we also talk about what we're grateful for yeah now a lot of people say okay we heard you say that but what do you fill your days with well we obviously have this business but you also need to find something for for ourselves a hobby exercise reading research go to the library when was the last time you were in the library and got lost in some research on a hobby or a or anything that you wanted to learn something about or spend time with a friend you know having a community in retirement is really critical I also think this is a great time you know I know for me weekends were filled with chores when I was working because that was the only time I had a chance to do them but they were always the emergency chores well there are also chores that like kind of overwhelmed me because I had to get it all done now you know I can space out you know I can clean a closet I can clean a drawer I can organize part of the basement I can take a load of stuff to a charity you know so you know adding a chore or something like that to do each day actually makes it a little more fun and a lot less pressure you know the other thing that we've found is that we retired with closets filled with work clothes that we haven't worn in years we've already purged twice right really give serious thought to getting rid of your work clothes so that someone else can wear them you know I think that's really really important you know I think it's important to remember that building each day with a plan begin with your plan it'll do wonders for your boredom it almost negates the opportunity for boredom to get in plus I think it's okay at the end of the day when we're having dinner whatever to check in and see how did we do today right what was it what was the best thing that we did today and what are we looking forward to tomorrow right you know if you stick to this schedule with the morning planning making commitments and activities and filling your days putting in some down time too you'll feel less bored and more excited about what tomorrow brings so the last thing we want to share with you to make sure boredom does not creep into your retirement is to protect your weekends we did talk about that a little bit how weekends were so important to us during our career but they're really important now too we really like our weekends we do and you know we we fight that urge and we fight that wave and we actually fight some clients on the fact that they say shouldn't every day be a Saturday now that I'm retired but our weekends we still do fun weekends right and our response is no you know protect your weekend Savor your weekend still make Saturday Saturday plus you do want to plan some things we did another video on this we want you want to plant some things so you know what day of the week it is right you don't want to just feel like every day is a Saturday but we do certain things on Mondays and Wednesdays and Fridays and all of that but the other thing about weekends is a lot of our friends are younger and they still work right so we plan things to do on the weekend with them because they're more available yeah I mean even if it's dinner out or a farmer's market or breakfast or you know a day trip to a to a village nearby we plan that on the weekends really savoring that weekend time you know what you don't want to do is be a weekend homebody because because there are crowds you know it's okay these days to get out you know bring your own crowd into the weekend bring your own energy into the weekend so we're big fan of weekends so make your weekends fun all right we're at the end and we wanted to give you three steps to get unstuck if you feel like you're bored first thing is as soon as you feel bored do something fun for yourself do not sit there in your sadness work on the hobby read for an hour call a bunch of friends just pick up your phone and call your friends don't just sit there and lament that you're bored you know something easy you can do is to just turn on some music loud music dance sing I like loud music Mark doesn't so much but I turn on music when I feel that boredom creeping in the second thing is spend some time planning a vacation Dream a Little Google some fun places pick some great hotels or Resorts make it a project that when you have time you feel that you can work on it get a folder include kids don't include kids include another couple talk to your spouse where do you want to go and how can you dream there's actually science around the fact that you get happier oh yeah when you're planning a vacation as opposed to even just going on the vacation so yeah if you get happier planning your day if you just sit there and plan your day even if you don't do everything it gets exciting right all right right you're feeling bored here's the third thing you can do get out of the house and take a walk fresh air if it's raining if it's snowy it doesn't matter dress for the weather go to a beach and walk along the beach or walk in the in the woods on a trail the Japanese call that Forest bathing if you're bored get out and move you know feeling bored is not a good feeling and it's not an option for you in retirement if it continues for a long period of time it can be debilitating when it kicks in adjust and do something to get you out of this funk now if you want to learn more ideas on having fun in retirement check out this video right here we just posted a while ago and it gives you a lot of great ideas and if you enjoyed this please share with your friends and also please subscribe by clicking the Subscribe button below and finally join our free Facebook Community the link is also in the notes below thanks for being with us today and we'll be back again soonRead More
living in a cluttered home filled with too many possessions that don't mean anything to you can create stress anxiety and depression and you have to know that this clutter is actually stealing from you whether you know it or not it's stealing your energy it's certainly stealing your space it's stealing your money and it's definitely stealing your happiness you know it's been proven that people are less productive in a cluttered environment now look this idea of decluttering is so hard for some people and maybe you have a little bit of a hoarder mentality I think we all do we don't like to throw certain things away or maybe you always disagree with your partner on what gets thrown away yeah exactly like that stupid frying pan from college that you had there had Teflon peeling off and was killing us one egg at a time you know clutter breeds more clutter Mark's mom loved pigs pigs everywhere not live pigs but she did like live pigs pigs in every way shape or form if they were printed on plates painted on cups she had knickknacks years of pigs every gift she was given I swear had a pig on it yeah and because over the years I was buying my mom so many Pig things Jody started buying meat Pig things and I said no no I'm not the pig person no only after so this is well it's an example of someone who has a I don't know roosters or pigs or pillows would do tchotchke names on it oh that's nice but then people start giving you all this stuff and in the end your house is filled with it I mean think about it how do we get clutter in the first place and if and if you go back to what we just said you do have objects that remind you of important things or objects that have sentimental value those are hard ones we're going to talk about that at the end actually how to declutter those but then there's the expensive yeah oh really like the snowshoes that you purchased top of the line snowshoes that we have those are going to my niece who lives in Vermont they've been going to Lucy for years okay so this is what this is how this is going to go today but so to your point an expensive purchase sometimes we're afraid to let go right right we also take a lot of comfort in our possessions sure you know they make us feel comfortable you know people give us gifts and maybe you don't really want them but you hate to just get rid of them because sometimes they look for them when they come into your house well we're talking about that at the end too because that's not fair that we don't get rid of it just because they gave it to us right so appliances from your kids wait we use the air fryer twice let's jump into decline we need better air frying stuff come on recipes yes all right so if you have a good air frying recipe stick it below yeah let's talk about our process right now this might seem mundane and very granular but this is what you need to do to start and you want to start small so you have some easy wins just try it try taking your kitchen utensil drawer and take that apart first start with the area above it can't have all sorts of stuff clean that out but then take your drawer open it up and everything comes out as you're taking it out if you know something's definitely going to go in the garbage put in the garbage but get everything out clean the drawer and then if you need any kind of new separators or organizational stuff you know you want to get that ahead of time well and I'd be careful I mean you know maybe you have two of something so it doesn't go in the garbage but it goes into a bit where you're going to well I know I'm just saying I mean I'm just garbage things well if there's something in there that's garbage I'm saying put it in the garbage don't put it on the counter right but if there's something that you can donate so here's the things you can do you take it out and you want to sort it some it's either going to go in the garbage you're going to donate it it's going to go back in the drawer or saved items might go in a different drawer so you might reorganize a little bit so you can actually start a new junk drawer no and we're not in a junk drawer we're in a utensil door you're right but it might belong somewhere else this is what I do you don't do this I know you mess up I clean them I love this stuff very true but you want to keep going until the counter is clean and the drawer is full and maybe you need to make a list of new things you need like the rusty can opener doesn't work anymore but do one drawer get it done and look at it and you'll feel great and then keep going if you have the energy but do not start a new drawer never mark never start a new drawer unless you have the commitment to finish it correct right don't look at me I'm like the king of this oh my goodness so just take pictures and leave them below there's nothing worse than having a drawer half empty on the counter in there and then you won't touch it for days yep but there's also some Rules of Engagement if you're married or in a relationship or you live with someone if you have a roommate right yeah you can't you can't create this d-cut cluttering plan and have it lead to fighting you know you got to make it fun you got to make it purposeful and you could even turn it into a game you know you can agree on some items and maybe you choose not to agree on other items and I know we have a few of those well the other thing to do is if I'm going to clean a drawer I make sure Jody is gone for the day and I do it and then she doesn't even notice it but it feels so much cleaner I feel great huh what do you mean is that when that happens that's when it happens you think a little munchkin comes in the middle of night and does it no so you're going through this process start small start small start with a drawer make sure you can finish it and make sure you stay till the end we're going to give you some tips on decluttering the sentimental items that's where we really get stuck yeah we'll all do all right so let's tackle the bathroom okay now we've done the kitchen kitchen drawer not the whole kitchen which is testing we're getting warmed up all right now we're in the bathroom okay another easy one under the sink in the drawers medicine cabinet get some divisors for down below but most of the crap down there you could throw out you just don't need it you know what's funny is there are dates and expiration dates on a lot of things you know and I know there's debate whether they're true expiration dates or not but I know when we did this recently and we went through like half of our sunscreens had expired well yeah they moved all over the place and so you know you got to look at the dates look at things that are half empty things that you can combine things you don't use anymore and pay particular attention to medicines right and you can't flush everything down like you have to figure that out but the same rules apply when you're taking everything out it's either garbage donate goes back or go somewhere else and you need to be rigid with yourself you can't mess around with this you got to make sure you do it right all right so now you've had some good and easy wins and everybody feels like I should start a new business how to how to declutter people's houses I would love to do like Maria Conde or whatever yeah we should switch shift from retirement transform to clean your house I should just go out more in the house would maybe be cleaner because apparently you do it well all right so we've had some easy wins everyone's feeling great now you got to figure out how to do the rest of the house so you want to set a time frame to finish it let's say six months well you can do six months I I would say do this you know count your rooms before you set your time frame so if you have three bedrooms a living room dining room and kitchen you know that's six so then the six month time frame give yourself a month in each room I was going to say a week oh I would do a week in each of those rooms and I would say the attic the garage and the basement for Less you are definitely the expert oh yeah because they're complicated they're loaded with things that always kind of move around the house and that's where they end up well they're also loaded with things that aren't necessarily yours what do you mean so our basement attic garage is loaded with things that are the kids well that too yeah yeah but the bedrooms that's another process and I think it's it's individual but you have to take your dresser take everything out touch every piece of stuff that goes in there and put it on your bed you do my dresser when I'm gone no I never touch your dresser but it's either going to go back in the dresser it's going to donate or it's going to go and that's where donating really feels good if you have you know things that you're not wearing or things that you're not using that you know other people can use and you get them together and you put them in the car and you donate them that really does feel good bedrooms are tough because you tend some people tend to have piles of things boxes and all of that so you just have to start somewhere and keep working your way around and that's why maybe six months is a good time but I do the stuff in my hanging my hanging clothes you know if I look at a piece and I haven't worn it in a year it gets donated and what's funny is when I go through that process every year sometimes I always find a few pieces that I haven't worn in three years right but now that you have some Rhythm let's in and then move on to the dining room if you have one you know you might have a dining room cabinet that's full of glasses and platters and you know just make sure you're using them all or donate them or hand them down to their kids if they're family heirlooms living which by the way the kids don't love like China my kids don't anymore China Crystal they kind of look at it and go like no what am I going to do with that living rooms you're going to run into problems because you're going to probably have a lot of sentimental things in there like we said we're going to cover that at the end so keep listening but it's the same process yeah and and I can tell you firsthand so while you're cleaning drawers and potentially under the sink I got stuck cleaning the attic before we moved out of New York so the attic can definitely be a multi-day project and here is really the time to be really clear with yourself that you're gonna get rid of junk I mean just yeah I need a dumpster that's where junk ends up and believe me I learned that firsthand attic basement garage yeah they're tough multi-day projects might want to do it on a weekend and then clean the areas up you might benefit from putting some shelving in there or some racks we like to use those racks that have wheels on them so you can move them around the garage and clean it when you need to but right it's really um it's for me it's a fun process it's painful sometimes but in the end gosh you just feel so much better well listen thanks for staying to the end but now let's talk about what to do with the sentimental things you know first thing you can do is see if your kids or any other family members want it and believe me we tried that we got a few things from our parents we didn't know what to do with them and I remember our kids looking at us with a few Furniture pieces and said no we don't want your brown furniture so um we had a hard time we actually had to donate it donated a lot all right so with sentimental things you need to be intentional is it something that we actually use or is it just feeding memories if it's that I don't know that spoon in the kitchen you never use it because it's all crappy and old and Rusty get rid of it if you're not using it are you talking about my grapefruit spoon with the serrated edges no that's that's up on a mount on the wall with a plaque my grandmother game but don't keep these things in your life just if it's for the memory if it's feeding memories maybe limit the number like one photo one spoon for grapefruit one serving dish one tool from your dad one beloved heirloom just keep one but not all of them it's just it's just too much gosh that's a hard one what you just went through I know I guess the other thing you could do and this is a big project but turn your photos into a digital format you know get the digital picture frame what is the name of our picture frame it's called Remember uh Adventure we'll find out what it is put a link below it's amazing it just flips through pictures all day long well you can upload them from anywhere that you have Wi-Fi and you can also Grant access to other people to upload so if one of the kids takes a great picture when they're here and they have access they can upload that so instead of having hundreds of photos just send baskets do that and it's hard to have hundreds of photos if then something happens to you like your mom we have 12 moving boxes of photos that your mom had now you also can make a scrapbook which is kind of fun and if you're not really good at this you can hire someone to do it but take some photos some letters some cards and notes and put them in a scrapbook put some handwritten notes in the column one why that item is important to you and maybe it's something you could pass on to your kids and this and this fifth one is hard for me be a burden you know if someone gives you a gift and you know you're gracious and you accept it and but it's not something you want to keep forever you can't keep it forever because that's really how clutter starts all over again look this is a hard process but in the end you lighten the load you make space in your home and you make space in your mind and you're gonna feel happier really having more empty space in your home will make you feel a difference in so many areas of your life now if you like this video you're really going to like this next one do this instead of downsizing now not everyone wants to downsize so it's not going to work for everyone but in this video we walk you through ways you can make your current home feel fresh and new and we give you 10 easy low-cost tips to upgrade your house so watch this nextRead More
Rhythm plays a big part in successful marriages when both Partners work or even when one works they have lives outside of their relationship together and these Separate Lives become part of their identity even if one of the spouses is a stay-at-home partner they usually by now have had routines that work really well both in the home and outside of the home and when One retires the Rhythm is a bit disrupted to say to the least it could be a tornado the peaceful Harmony is gone and replaced by some chaos and stress you know it's funny we just started watching a new show on TV called shrinking husband and wife are in the kitchen life's been a stay-at-home she's got a routine she she does rocks what does she do polishes she's all this stuff the husbands I don't know I forget what he is a lawyer or something like that but he's just about to retire and he's in the kitchen and the wife looks at him and says hey look it or more like this hey look it Derek Derek before you retire you need to find something to keep you out of the house each day I've been running this house for 30 years and I don't want my life disrupted and it's funny because his response was no I've been out of the house for 30 years and now I think you need to find something outside the house it's my time to be home that was actually pretty fun it was pretty funny but you can see without some tools this could be a rocky start to the retirement phase right so there's a way to smooth this transition and let's get into some ways that people can do this so that you don't find yourself really in a tough spot and the first way without a doubt is like those two just did communicate expectations well I don't think they did that very well well they started a conversation they started a conversation there's got to be verbal conversation about this you can't hope things are going to work out you've got to say what your expectations are because there's going to be a lot of difference of opinion on what they want to do yeah a lot of change is coming right and you know 50 percent of couples differ on what they want to do in retirement and that can impact them in a lot of ways and even financially so way before you retire five years before you need to start talking about this as a couple right right and even even ask yourself ask your partner as ask yourself first maybe and ask your partner some questions you know what do you dream about in retirement you know where do you want to live yeah how about downsizing do we want to downsize which is a big one yep and if you have kids where do they fit in right and grandkids these are all important issues that you need to talk about as a couple really in the initial phase or pre-retirement would be a great time to talk about it right and I know during our career we had a tough time fitting in date night with the responsibility of the kids and all of that I think date night and retirement's almost just as important if not more important to have a little bit of time to check in well because a lot of people feel you're spending 24 hours a day seven days a week together now there's no real reason to create that special time to check in but we're saying there is and what's our special time we have coffee every morning markets up super early I do not I get up at six and we have about 30 or 45 minutes every morning before we start well you've already started your routine but before I really started every morning we do that and we talk about you know how are we feeling we check in with each other what are our dreams for today this week this month we plan our day it's just it really gives us a chance to always check in which is really helpful for us and maybe that's something you want to try so communicate and communicate often and stay in touch is one big piece another big piece is finances you know finances are an area of disruption in marriages and certainly an area of disruption in retirement who is going to deal with the money matters who's going to pay the bills and do you agree on Money Matters yeah well it's true there was a study we found by Fidelity Investments from 2021 that said 25 percent are couples 25 percent of couples are irritated by their spouse's pen spending habits and relationship with money and that's before retirement right so that irritation enhances even more once you retire because many of you are retiring and you've already built your nest egg and many of you are working with a financial planner which is great so you have knowledge of your finances but when you retire it takes getting used to not having that steady paycheck right and when it stops there are some areas you need to focus on and adjust yeah I mean there's things like taxes your monthly expenses you know do you still need you know all the fancy cable travel plans do we really want to do that big trip or not but you need to save for it right you know downsizing dreaming of a second home you know one of the big ones that our financial planner has really pushed on us is this idea of withdraw stress strategies right making sure that you know before you could just hit the ATM and you know you had income coming in you could withdraw whenever you wanted now it's a little different well also the 401K right Social Security optimizing that when's the right time to do that and having a rainy day fund for unexpected medical expenses right right so okay so the third broad category is establishing boundaries right so this is again this is your bread and butter no it isn't this is again under the big topic of topic of keeping Harmony As you move into retirement right you have to find a way to ex to respect each other's time especially if one's still working and the other isn't you know your space you know one house with two separate schedules potentially if you're retiring at different times you know how you're going to spend your down time you know your TV time your reading time your cooking time yeah because even your cleaning time if one of you is working and you're working from home and one of you is like bound and determined to vacuum the whole house every morning at nine it's just not gonna work you know so you have to adopt each other's schedule you know for me it's important to find a place and a time for a long time time for separate friends outside of the house and all of these need boundaries and agreement so you don't find yourself banging up against each other doing each other's activities it creates stress and you don't need that you know we have friends who are actually clients of ours and she was a teacher and he's run his business a sports marketing firm out of their home for years she was a teacher so she was gone from seven to five every day let's say and now she's home and she's doing everything she's she loves to do she's hosting Mahjong and swim parties and lunch with friends she's taken a cooking class well all of that is happening in their house which is giving her really good fulfillment because she's amazing amazing he's like what's going on but he's trying to run a business in the same space so that's an example of where boundaries and communication really needs to come in you really want to respect each other's activities and priorities and space so you don't again step on each other's toes yeah so that the fourth big category of advice that we have in this in this in this arena is what what is your division of labor now that one of you is retired how do you split the chores who's going to cook who's going to shop who's going to pay the bills this is a whole new conversation I think at this point you can't make Grand assumptions that now that you're retired you're going to do all of that yeah and that's true and the other and I think what you want to make sure you do is do what you pick the things that you're good at and you like to do I love to cook I don't really like to shop well hangout I'm good at shopping I don't love it no but but I'm good at it yeah I'm good at cooking and you love it I do love it you don't love shopping who loves grocery shopping I'll take the shopping over too oh cooking and shopping cooking and shopping wow that's a win for me today here's the other thing and I don't I don't know what it's like in your house but I'm the I'm the guy that fixes stuff yeah so what I don't want to get from Jody every morning is a list of things that have to get fixed home repairs house maintenance car repairs you know there there are things that have to get done your car needs to go in and that's my responsibility I need I need to do it but I don't want a list right to put under my nose every day but this idea of talking about who's going to do what and it's not just about chores and cooking and bills but even who's responsible for scheduling activities who's a social butterfly that's right or me right so I end up doing you know golf dates pickleball dates dinner arrangements travel arrangements and that's fine I do actually like doing those things so that helps us stay in our Rhythm you know in the beginning we talked about how couples find a natural Rhythm that will take them through many years of their marriage and maybe the one that you had worked and worked well but the newly retired person shouldn't get a free ride on being engaged in the Rhythm yeah you know we've we have clients that get in trouble with this because you've got that example on the TV show shrinking uh where you've got someone who's in charge of the house and has her routine and everything's going really well and then the retired spouse comes in and says all right so what are we going to do all day right and they're like well no you do your thing I'll do my thing I'll meet you later for dinner so you have to be really careful you do but the other big thing is this whole idea of one person retiring before the other it's going to create a lot of change in your life and you need to understand that the change is going to come it's going to create friction and stress so if that's happening the right thing is happening you just need to walk your way through it and talk about it the person who's retiring you know the person who retired earlier stayed home has interest hobbies and groups and friends the new person retiring needs to create new interests new hobbies new groups and new friends we think so right because that's the way you build community and you stay active what you want to make sure that you're doing is if one is working and one is retired and the retiring spouse is crushing it in all those areas you want to make sure you're looping in the working spouse so people you know don't feel left out you all of a sudden have new friends and new interests and new hobbies which is awesome but remember to Loop in the working spouse too and I think the other thing is you've got to keep your relationship alive and healthy it's really important when one of these changes takes place that you're dedicating enough time to each other to show you care about them you're concerned about them and you love them back to your point on date night don't I do that well you do you always feel loved I do oh good good so look retirement is something we all look forward to and we deserve to find ways to make it the best years of our life and we really want to be able to live in harmony with our partner and if you've just retired or it's coming up soon make sure to follow some of our advice here and importantly make sure you're starting to talk about this phase of life with your partner or spouse to share your dreams and aspirations now if you enjoyed this video check out this next one the truth about early retirement what they don't tell you this is a great video we talk about the endless opportunities that exist and you aren't getting any younger now might be the right time to retire so check out this video nextRead More
we spent a good portion of Our Lives savings for retirement so we don't want to squander it away on useless items or pick up poor spending habits you know we're you get to this point you're on a fixed income you want to be careful so not every tempting purchase is going to bring value to your retirement actually many purchases can lead to unforeseen burdens which has happened to us it definitely has happened to us the last thing we all need is to find ourselves strapped financially and sitting on stuff and things that create more work than they do experience and they also have tremendous expense yeah they might bring a little bit of Joy but not enough to justify it right today we're going to dive in and unveil for you five purchases that might seem appealing at first but have hidden pitfalls in retirement and if you guys are new here thanks for joining us I'm Mark and this is my wife Jody we don't focus on the financial aspects of retirement but rather lifestyle Health relationships and much more to do us a favor hit the Subscribe button the notification button and if you could share this video or others would with some of your friends that'd be awesome we're really trying to grow this Channel and get more people to watch our stuff and have a good retirement all right so let's jump in here we go retirees often believe they're making wise purchases and wise purchasing choices to to enjoy their golden years but many of them end up with regrettable financial dreams so first category is luxury items without a good purpose let's face it we've worked hard our entire lives up till now and if there's a little bit of extra money laying around it's a good time to splurge right it is I'm trying to think like what do we mean by luxury items well I think if you think about it is that something that might cause twice as much as the basic version or three times or four times yeah but doesn't bring as much value yeah so exotic sports car okay or even a brand new fancy car or my hankering that's hanging out there an antique pickup truck a 1957 Ford or Chevy pickup the year I was born so I could bang around town in that that's not a smart thing that's why I haven't bought it yet right so so exotic sports cars okay so they serve a purpose but do you really need the latest and greatest you don't yeah and what are you going to do about maintenance and cost That's my kind of pushback on this truck what truck the truck you want I is one it's not gonna happen it's just a little thing I have out there don't worry about it you're not getting the truck I promise not I promise we're not going to get a truck so anyway Exotics you're retired you need your car is up uh you had a company car do you buy it do you lease it is it new or used you kind of remember depreciation what kind of options do you need do you really need do you really need the latest and greatest uh Lexus GS 250 or I don't know but you need a car right you need to get around so I think it's important to really challenge yourself when you're thinking of getting a car or a fancy car does it really make sense and the other so I'm good on that one because I'm not really a fancy car person all right how about the latest computers phones gadgets I mean I love gadgets so far these two are speaking to you okay so all right let's jump into something different okay how about high-priced designer clothing I mean this outfit costs one I'm not really a high price designer clothing kind of guy wow I kind of wish I was but I do believe and I do have friends that have you look nice by the way I like it thank you I have one friend that has seven pairs of those Golden Goose sneakers and they're like 750 a pair I don't have any of that stuff but you know we have flyers I wish they'd come back you don't remember PF Flyers no back to luxury items right so for all luxury items I think it's important to think about resale maintenance and costs longevity of use and is it practical right so that's maybe the best way to define for you individually what is a luxury item and we're over with jewelry it's out no no more fancy jewelry right what you have is fine yeah you're good yeah actually pretty happy if you want we're gonna start selling something all right so timeshare what about that the second item would be a time share which is appealing to a lot of people we know people that have time shares and they've had them for decades that's great yeah but if you're a retirement now you say thinking about a time share you really want to challenge yourself on that there's hidden costs monthly maintenance Insurance property taxes there's risks um gosh Geographic risks political risk you know where you buy a time share right the resale value is a little sketchy on some of that thing and the other thing is flexibility of dates right because we we travel we we do Airbnb or VRBO right which is a really good option I think well it is most of the time if you do the research ahead of time I don't know a lot about time shares but I do know we do have friends that utilize them a lot well they go the same two weeks right every year to the same place now the good thing is they've been doing that for a long time they know the staff right they know the other people that go at the same time but if it's new to you really what we're saying is give that a lot of thought you're 60 65 years old how much longer are you going to go to this location do you want to be tied to one local do you still like doing the same things the same activities I mean vacation and retirement is important but and travel is right and just make sure that you vet everything that is included well the third thing that you really should never buy and when we say you never should buy we don't really mean never well but it's individual large and expensive boats or hobby equipment so we what's so funny we've been boating for a very long time and during our career we carved out weekends and we went boating and it was really important to us and then we got a little bit of a bigger boat so we could go further afar but then we retired and said okay this is great we have all this free time let's get even a bigger boat so we can go away for longer periods of time so we did that and we sold it a year later the thing is I think it's really important to figure out if you're going to get a boat does it really fit into your lifestyle we thought it would we did but we now with all our free time travel to go see the kids we have them come to our house we hang out they don't want to go on the boat with us so I think that that's something you know talk about depreciation you buy a new boat there's this saying that uh a boat is a hole in the water into which you pour money now there's some acronym oh the uh the best day and uh the best day to buy the best day of boating is the day you sell it or something like that yeah yeah anyway well I think the thing about an investment like a boat is it has to be part of your retirement vision and in that retirement Vision you have to have explained to all of your community right your children your partner your spouse your it has to be part of what you do otherwise it is a huge floating expense well we yeah and and we started entertaining more at the house and visiting the kids and then when you're not on the boat I have a real problem with a luxury becoming an obligation right and our boat really became an obligation to us and we really got angry with ourselves and each other because we weren't spending enough time on it I think it got more angry at me than I did it myself really yeah anyway uh we have friends that have large boats right in Florida but that's their winter home so if that's what works it works anyway expensive hobby equipment you know we're going on a safari next year can't wait for that and we're like we should get a camera with a long lens take pictures of all the animals not we're bringing our our iPhones and then we're gonna maybe maybe borrow a camera from a friend don't need the highest end camera for a two-week Safari right buying high-end drones uh expensive gym equipment you know I work out with freeletics app doing body weight you go to yoga we don't we don't you don't need to buy all that stuff yeah well and and if you do and it's part of your vision and it's part of your financial plan and you've budgeted for it then great but really the message in this is just be careful be careful not to jump into certain things the other thing that a lot of people face when they retire is their home does it make sense to buy a much larger home we have six children all over the place and in order for us to have a home large enough for them to come visit we need a seven bedroom house oh gosh not with the grandkids it needs to be eight or nine okay we'll get a nine bedroom house then it's just it's just so it's not we're actually downsizing we're buying smaller houses we we are at this phase where maybe and hopefully we start to spend more time at our kids houses for holidays and things like that and the other thing that we do is uh when we have kids come in town is no room we do Airbnb they are VRBO or somehow figure out how long are they coming where are they staying are they bringing pets like what do we need to do I think when you're looking at upsizing you know when you retire because maybe you have a nice pension you have a wind full of money you have stock you need to cash out whatever it is you've got to think of things more than just the cost of this new grand home right the ongoing cost you have to think of insurance and taxes and heating and air conditioning and Landscaping and maintenance all of that has to go into your decision-making process otherwise you may find yourself behind the eight ball a little bit so that's you know you really need to give that consideration we don't say it's wrong to do but right if it works for you that's great there's nothing like having all of the kids all the friends and family around for holidays and things like that absolutely another thing not to buy is these new Financial products that are unvetted and Mark and I have a lot of Congress conversations about this because we have friends that are into some um wildly High returned short-lived unvetted Financial I don't even know what they're called Bitcoin and nfts yeah that I don't know if that's but if you're if you've got money to invest it's really not smart to say have a friend say I got this thing it's a 20 return you should give me 100 Grand or 50 Grand or 10 000 or 5 000.
It could be gone in a minute it could evaporate so you want to get good advice from a financial planner before you invest in anything that looks and sounds a little bit like is that really possible Right is it is it the right thing for me to do with my money now right and we're a big Advocates of and we are not financial planners but finding yourself a financial planner and getting your Baseline really understanding your spending and your withdrawal strategies and really trying to figure out where you can go moving forward you know we have this um arrangement with new retirement and the link is below for their dashboard that you can get that ties together all your financial information to show you on one screen how much money you have and then you can run all sorts of different scenarios it's a really cool tool if you don't have it you should take a look at it but you know we're talking about your nest egg right right what are you going to do with it you want to protect it and make smart decisions and really there is no get rich scheme no in retirement we've all worked hard to get here and hopefully we have enough money to last and live a comfortable lifestyle that's been the goal right probably the best advice we can give is to live within your means make smart purchases and make good financial decisions with solid advice yeah we only get to retire once so we shouldn't blow it by making rash and short-sighted purchases we hope you enjoyed this and if you did this next video Don't retire without this financial advice even though we're not financial advisors there's some great information in here we touch on emergency funds living within your means you just mentioned that and some tips on social security so watch this nextRead More
the thought of downsizing makes sense to many people and for those people there are great benefits but it's not for everyone so many people have left comments on our Channel about the fact that they don't want to downsize so we decided to do a little research on that and put together why it might not work for you so you can actually feel good about that decision and give it a a different look instead of thinking you have to do it maybe you don't have to do it I mean staying put in your current home may be the smartest thing you ever did all right so you've got this couple that we know really well they're our age their second generation owners of a home her dad who just passed away lived with them until he died at the age of 93 right yeah yeah and while at times that was difficult having him in there it really was a good end of life situation for him and they enjoyed their last time oh absolutely and now it's two of them you know all three of their kids have moved out and they actually have a second apartment second income apartment yeah which is literally a separate entrance you know and that pays a lot of the house costs I think it pays all the house costs because their mortgage is so low now because they've been they've been there for so long right and they have this younger couple now that checks in on them right so and there's still plenty of room for the kids to visit and they host events so it really made sense for them not even to think about the idea of downsizing right yeah and you know you and I talked a little bit about it you know the sign of the times is that you know a lot of our kids aren't even buying homes they're not so when they when they want to come back somewhere for a holiday it's our home so let's talk a little bit about some real concrete reasons why downsizing may not make sense right the first is financial reasons maybe the numbers just don't make sense and this is what we get a lot on our on our comments right is it they it they can't afford to move out into something even smaller right because they have they have no mortgage right and or you can just afford to stay put yeah like it's just like a no-brainer you know in a lot of instances the real estate market dictates whether or not you can afford to sell your house at a high but then where do you go well the thing is the real estate market right now in 2023 it's hot I mean everything is up so if you can sell your house at the highest it's ever been when you go to buy something it's at the highest it's ever been so it really it doesn't really matter so that's one of the aspects of financial the other aspects of the financial is maybe the monthly cost for your current home works for you yeah I know that works for like my pop right for example we wanted him to move after my mom passed away because he's in a big town he has a three-bedroom townhouse for one person he has a three bedroom three-story townhouse with a full finished basement but there's nowhere he can go two-bedroom townhouse is more money and and the monthly costs yeah you know and all of that so monthly cost is really a good thing to kind of plug in the other the other uh financial piece is a mortgage if you've paid off your mortgage you just have a little bit left why would you want to take on some debt so these are all good reasons not to want to sell your house and move and you should always check with a financial planner or a banker right just to get a little more clarity on the finance piece of downsizing or not so so the first reason you may not want to downsize is financially might not make sense that'll sum that up secondly you know you may just live in a community where you have family nearby that are going to visit yeah and a lot of people have that their kids are there their grandkids are there this is not us our kids live in six different states all over the U.S right but for people that have the children who have grown up they have jobs and they live in the same town they're having their own families and they want to come to Grandma and Grandpa's house for uh Thanksgiving or whatever the holiday might be or birthdays or sleepovers right then you know it's hard to get up and leave from that yeah and that's if the kids are there you know we're still in a generation where maybe our elderly parents still live nearby either at their home or in a facility you know of some kind so you know we are that generation that you know is still kind of figuring out what to do with our kids and grandkids and then still maybe have elderly parents so you know it's not the case for us because our kids do live all over the U.S in in six different states right and our grandkids live all the way in California although that idea of living in the same town with everybody that would be awesome I mean if that's really sweet if that was the case I think we would rethink where we live right now yeah so we're we're I'm not fortunate that they don't live near us but it's not a reason for us to stay in the same town we grew up in you know interestingly enough I found an article in AARP that did a survey and three quarters of the people over 50 wanted to stay in their house as long as possible that's a that that's a big chunk of people it was a big chunk of their survey my parents stayed your your mom stayed in in their house she did my parents never left and the survey went on to say 69 of the people said they have a relative living within close proximity to their home which helped make their decision right so you know there are reasons with family and proximity that may make sense not to downsize and move right so we talked about financial reasons not to downsize we talked about um having the family or kids live nearby or sisters or brothers whoever it might be the other thing is where you live right now might be the greatest Community ever and the lifestyle is great for you so why get up and and leave it doesn't make any sense that's right you know you might have the best if you if you have neighbors who were still there and they've been there for 30 or 40 years these are really good friends and it's critical to have these kind of people in your life yeah you can't underestimate the value of the friends that may live nearby or you may be able to walk to town and love your village and your shopkeepers and your restaurants and your local markets you know some sometimes your community provides you an opportunity to be an active volunteer yeah the other thing is as you retire you find new things in in your community that you can do right you didn't do before because now you have this 40 plus hours of free time that came your way you could volunteer right you could join a gym maybe your town has bicycle pass and you want to take up walking or cycling and just live healthier so you get to investigate what your community has and maybe you didn't know before right we joined a YMCA down here I've never belonged to a YMCA before ever in my life and I'm like why didn't I I know because they're everywhere but it really has become a good Social Hub for us and also a lifestyle yeah and a lot of studies show that towns that have a ym or YWCA really promote community and we did find that and if you live in a home or a condo or whatever it is and you can walk to Town versus drive that is a huge plus yeah because once you leave that and move out you know where you have to get in the car to go somewhere you're going to find you walk less I grew up my hometown I grew up in a college town in a big college town and there was something about that as my parents aged that kept them alive and with a buzz and you know living in that college town feel with all of those kids and all of those restaurants and all that comes with it I think if you're in a college town that might actually be a reason not to doubt I I agree because there's just an energy about it that's really really important yeah now another reason why you might not want to downsize or move is because you want to age in place and that's listen if that's what you want to do then you should try to figure out a way to do it right yeah I mean it's a big decision it's a big decision a family decision a financial decision it's whether or not you have the room to age appropriately in your house you know I know our house in Connecticut it is a vertical house four stories it would not be a great place to age you know no because it's an old house the stairs are really steep they're right they're steep narrow yeah not real deep stuff but if you can age in place in your home because that's a new thing and there's a lot of research we should actually do a video on that no Aging in place because there's a lot of new resources available there is but the other thing the other reason not to downsides is maybe there just aren't any good choices where you live yeah you can't actually go smaller your current or your current home is the perfect size yeah sometimes it's harder to live with one less bedroom than it is just to have one extra bedroom right so you know sometimes if you own a home and you want to go into an apartment apartment living just isn't for everybody no no you know and so maybe your current home has a small yard and you can still garden and you still get some energy out of that so that's another reason I think the sixth reason is really important and that's just maybe you're just not emotionally ready you know you're not ready to downsize and that's a very personal decision it is and it's if you have a partner you have to figure this out together you know again there's other videos we have on our Channel about downsizing and the Dilemma and how to work it out but maybe you know just take a pause say you know what we're not going to downsize we're going to stay here maybe we'll right size well you were ready to downsize way before I was ready to downsize and it caused friction for I would say a couple of years yeah every time you brought it up I wasn't interested and it took some time so if you're not ready that's okay right there's there's a long life ahead of you you know we we talk a lot about um because we think we're in a good spot right now but what is 10 years from now look like where will we live our kids are all somewhere else we would like to live at least near one set of kids that might help take care of us I don't know but maybe not hard because how do you choose one set of kids to go live near yeah I mean I don't know how you do that so but anyway if you don't feel the need to downsize that should be okay have comfort in that decision and you can always do it at a later date and lamenting over it time and time again it's going to wear you out and you're going to wear out your partner and your kids so if you can't decide right now just be okay or do what we did just agree to talk about it annually you know be curious about your future don't have a closed mindset as to where you think you need to be but be clear where you stand right now and if you like this and you're dedicated to staying where you are right now watch this next video because it's called instead of downsizing try this just putting in some basic upgrades into your home decorating ideas to stay put and just spruce up your home and we give you 10 inexpensive changes you can make to your home so watch this nextRead More
preparing for retirement is a major life transition and tackling the emotional side of this can trigger a wide range of feelings from excitement and anticipation to anxiety and uncertainty and these wide ranges of emotions are impacted by how retirement lands with you for example was it your idea to retire or were you forced out are you retiring early or later in life is your spouse or partner retired already or still at home and you're entering their domain all of these issues really impact how you show up in retirement but really regardless of how you got here you're here and the question is are you emotionally prepared for this transition so as Jody said it's a major life transition this whole idea of retirement and it Alters your sense of self it Alters your purpose and it really changes your daily activities you were used to going to work every day and now things are different so why are so many people entering this phase of Life emotionally unprepared because well we're going to show you what you need to do to get prepared but we have a client um let's call him Billy Billy's a good name right a good alias he was an entrepreneur for 25 years during high school he went to work for a restaurant and after about five or seven years he bought it from the owner and he ran that thing for a very long time and he had a great identity and a great business but about 20 years ago he sold it right and then he and what was interesting is he sold it about 20 years ago so maybe sold it at around 50.
Yeah and entered politics and worked in the state legislator created a whole new identity for himself a whole new community a whole new set of Knowledge and Skills that really propelled him for another 20 years yeah it was great but then he retired three years ago he has his full pension he's financially secure but he got he started to get in a little bit of trouble first of all his only hobby was golf and he lives in the Northeast where golf is not 12 months a year maybe but then he lost his wife which was really sad and all of a sudden now all of his dreams of retirement have changed so he's a solo retiree and he's not really taken the best care of himself physically and he's really having a tough time building new community outside of his golf right and that's when he came to us and we found a real pivotable turning point for him where he could go through some great self-discovery and transition yet again in his life and he went through our seven day challenge I think we'll put the link below so that you can have that and if you haven't taken the seven day retirement challenge even if you're 30 years old you should take it because there's really good stuff in there it's easy and it's free so we got him to go through the seven day challenge and start talking to us about it then he took our full your retirement game plan course and he started getting his life back on track which was really encouraging and there was some work on his part to do it but now he has a whole new outlook on his health both his physical and mental he's building tremendous great new quality communities of people and he's actually volunteering for several organizations that gives him a lot of fulfillment community and and more but he was totally unprepared for this change and maybe you are too so let's get in how to better prepare men before we do anything let's just address money because it's always the first thing on everyone's mind we don't do anything with money but I know it can't spend it you spend it my day too much sometimes I know it can create unwanted Stress and Anxiety and you know the fact is that many people underestimate their expenses and the stress that money has on their emotions as they're entering retirement yeah and the other thing that people might do and you really can't tell because the stock market is just crazy but some people or many people overestimate their investment income returns so that can put you in some emotional state too so really being better prepared financially is critical and that's not what we do here but but check that box you know so that you can live this phase with a little less stress work with your accountant or your financial planner to get a budget in place and you also you want to be able to work with them so that you can make some smart financial decisions like a good withdrawal strategy integrating with Social Security 401K maybe downsizing is something you should consider doing maybe you need to do it to cut your costs a little bit that's another whole level of stress and there's we have um search our YouTube channel for downsizing it's actually our most popular video if you're thinking about it but this is going to give you a clear Financial picture and this is so critical to a successful retirement like Jody said that just take away a lot of the stress so check the box on your financial picture and move that aside right so let's talk about some other big impact to your emotional preparedness in retirement the number one thing that we come up with the number one thing that we research the number one thing that our clients talk to us about is this idea of loss of identity and people really struggle with this you know coupled with the loss of purpose this is a big impact on your emotional preparedness well it is if your identity has always been tied into your title which a lot of people do in their office and your expense account your status in the community your status in the company if you were the CEO or if you're a doctor or a fireman or a lawyer or an accountant that's your identity and when you step away from your job that goes away and you know this happened to us and more than likely it will happen to you too it leads down a long journey of rediscovery in retirement and we'll leave a link below for the video on this topic which I think it would be really helpful now money and lost identity can have major impacts on you emotionally as you enter retirement but you also need to think about losing your community and ending up feeling socially isolated social isolation leaves many people unprepared for retirement and it's a huge health risk that again if you search our YouTube channel for social isolation and there's some great videos we put together on that you know when you walk away from your career there's a good chance that many of your key relationships won't follow you you know there are younger people they're still working they're still engaged they still have the purpose and the identity and you know they may have been situational relationships based on your employee employment you know they were your work family maybe not necessarily your close personal friends however you may bring some along with you you may you may but this loss of community catches so many people unprepared and surprised and you're gonna need to put real effort into creating a new community it does not happen on its own so let's share some tips on how to be better prepared emotionally as you transition into retirement and if you're in retirement a year two or three or five these things are going to work for you as well so the first thing you want to do is visualize your retirement and when we say that you know what does it look like what does it feel like what is your um what else what is your daily daily routine you know what habits or activities do you want to do do you want to put in your schedule and you know the big question is who is in your life yeah and who's important and positive in your life how about this where are you going to live right you know what are your dreams for what we call the five pillars of retirement what are your dreams for your physical wellness your mental Wellness your relationships your spouse partner relationship is ours good today so far so good so good and then wisdom sharing that the thing is dream a little bit and have a vision for this so that you can put some activities in place to get you to that vision and really getting to this vision is just yourself those basic questions that we just went through the next thing you'll want to do is to make a plan you know keep it simple at first include your financial goals and your lifestyle goals and definitely your health and wellness goals yeah the Five Pillars the vision the idea is to get to the vision you want to put a plan in place so that you get some things done and your plan is not one and done think about it retirement can last 30 years or more you don't spend 10 minutes putting a plan together right for a 30-year time in your life don't skip this part or you really could find yourself wandering a bit like a ruddlest ship lost at sea how's that that was very interesting yeah ship lost at sea you don't want to be that so after you visualize and make a plan it's critically important to stay connected right stay connected to your your family to your friends and to those past work colleagues that will come with you you know um we talked about the colleagues that stay behind and lose interest in your relationship it's really behooven upon us to go back to those work friends and reconnect and we've done that and also we've put effort into finding new friends and new relationships you need to dedicate time to this you do and you have to be intentional about it you know I just saw a really interesting quote a couple weeks ago in the paper by Jane Fonda about being intentional about your friendships it was very interesting you know being emotionally prepared for retirement includes this big one as well you have to address your fears what fears are you having and how are you going to tackle them one at a time head on you might even want to talk to a therapist you know and you also need a good we talk about this all the time because we don't do financial planning you need a good financial planner or wealth manager and you want to develop clear strategies to address all of these fears the big the first thing is to figure out what the fears are and then deal with them one at a time right and the final thing you can do is to practice self-care taking good care of your physical and emotional health exercising regularly eating healthy finding stress reducing activities to take care of you is important to be emotionally prepared you know we all spend a good portion of Our Lives thinking about retirement probably from when we leave college or high school and enter our career all we do is we save money we yearn for the freedom we get excited about what could be in store for us but many people don't prepare as much as they should for this transition to make it smooth fun exciting and fulfilling spend the time getting yourself prepared now if you like this video and we hope that you did this next one what's your identity once you retire we're going to walk you through the three phases of identity when you retire letting go of the old identity the neutral zone and finally putting some effort into discovering what your new identity is going to be and then we're going to give you three steps you can Implement right away so watch this next videoRead More
at our ages when we retired and even now we have energy we got a really good Baseline on our health and wellness so you kind of know where you are and what you need to do you have more time to do what you want to do versus waiting another five or ten years I mean I yeah it's true but you know I will tell you it's not all roses and butterflies right when we retired our health Baseline I'll say for both of us was pretty low and frankly I'm glad we learned that because we weren't paying attention to we weren't paying attention and had we continued working and living at the pace and eating and drinking The Way We Were through business and extracurricular activities you know we would have gotten a lot worse so we've used the past four years to work hard on that aspect of our life and I think we are feeling younger than we did four years ago when we did I definitely feel younger absolutely we know so many people who put off retiring for fear of what they'll do after and that's a true feeling so we get it you know the fear of what will I do is a real one that many of you experience but by putting off retirement you might be cheating yourself and maybe others who want to spend more time with you if you can afford to retire and it's your dream to have to leave your job then do it today we're going to take away some of that fear and leave you feeling inspired to take the leap and enter into this incredible phase of life but before we go further we want to introduce ourselves my name is Mark Rollins and I'm Jody Rollins and we started retirement transformed not only for us but for all of you and the 10 000 people turning 65 every day now we don't focus on the financial aspects of retirement but rather we pay attention and focus on lifestyle Health relationships and more if you're new here please hit the Subscribe button and also the notification button so you'll get notified when our videos come out I recently got into cycling and the first thing I did was to get to know local bike shop the first thing you did was spend an hour on Google that's true okay but the first thing that the results said was get to know someone in your bike shop so he went to the local bike shop and we met this great guy Greg who had a stellar career in Insurance just like you and I his finances were in order he got a package at 60 and he retired but he retired into something he was an avid cyclist and instead of just retiring he spoke to the owner of the bike shop and said hey I'm going to retire soon can I come work for 20 hours a week and he got a job and he loves it because it lined up with his passion right it gave him instant community in the shop and the people he was serving I I think he only did it for 20 hours 20 hours a week oh yeah he got paid he did but he loved more yeah the discounts on the equipment and clothing yeah which is a great way to think about retiring into something thinking about your passions and then what are some benefits but here's the big thing he was 60 and when we were chatting about this he really was deciding whether or not to work another five or ten years or retire and it's because he retired into something that he did it but he's been retired now for I think seven years and he loves his life it's great he works part-time his wife cycle so they have that in common well she Cycles as well but she's also retired and they do have that in common and you know she had her thing that she was doing for about 20 hours a week and then they do some things together including cycling even cycling as a vacation which is kind of cool they do we should do that sometimes we should where Europe sure come on well with some deep refreshing and planning retiring early has tremendous appeal and it can enhance your life in so many ways retired at 50 53 my new retired at 61.
2 61. oh 61. well I thought it would be 65 or 70. yeah and in the past four years we've made tremendous strides in our life you know our relationship because we're spending more time together and more quality time as well as quantity is better and I think our physical health is even better than you think it's absolutely better I feel younger and better than I ever have in my life because we've worked on it right well with all the new habits and routines that we have in place our mental Wellness is improving every day I mean it really is isn't it and the community that we're building in retirement is growing just like Greg in a bicycle shop you know um he's now got a whole new community that he's built post career and we have done the same thing so here's really want to get to today here's the truth about retiring early number one truth is you do have Newfound time and let's be honest work was hard and stressful and it was hard to find any time to do anything for yourself and when you get to walk away you find 40 or more hours a week to do with what you want to do and if you're someone who really loves their job and we hear this all the time I don't really want to leave because I love it I'm getting so much satisfaction but you could retire then here's the thing go to your employer and say you know what I want to stay but I want to work part-time I want to work 20 hours a week and that's okay or even 10 hours a week yeah I mean strike a deal and go part-time you know find that hour balance that works for you but just remember this your newfound time opens up major opportunities for you so let's go to another truth you know opportunities are truly endless you know start with your dream job that aligns with your passion kind of like Greg did at the cycle shop or maybe it's a non-profit for you that you really want to sink your heart and soul into you may want to coach somebody younger or somebody up and coming in your old company or if you're like Mark and I maybe you want to write a book and find a way to pour your stories into the book to help others well you could also travel a lot of people travel there's a lot of people that travel for a year we are traveling but not I mean taking a year I don't think we could do that no but you could start a hobby you know I started cycling we started playing golf again this winter in Florida we're going to take up pickleball we're committed we're committed but you also can spend time just re-engaging with old friends or or repairing some broken relationships with all this free time there's a lot that you can do but we don't want you to let the fear of not having a plan hold you back watch some of our other episodes on planning for a full and active retirement all the links for the shows that that align with what we're talking about today are below so okay so now you have some whether it's 40 Newfound hours or 20 or 10.
So let's go to another truth you can do this now because you are as young today as you're ever going to be in time yeah I think that's important I think it's important too because we we looked at it that way a little bit too at our ages when we retired and even now we have energy we got a really good Baseline on our health and wellness so you kind of know where you are and what you need to do you have more time to do what you want to do versus waiting another five or ten years I mean I yeah it's true but you know I will tell you it's not all roses and butterflies right when we retired our health Baseline I'll say for both of us was pretty low and frankly I'm glad we learned that because we weren't paying attention to we weren't paying attention and had we continued working and living at the pace and eating and drinking The Way We Were through business and extracurricular activities you know we would have gotten a lot worse so we've used the past four years to work hard on that aspect of our life and I think we are feeling younger than we did four years ago when we did I definitely feel younger absolutely I'm more fit um I have more energy you know and sometimes we find ourselves in retirement that we're working harder than we thought we would in retirement but the thing is this I don't know what we would be doing to fill our free time with if we hadn't started retirement transformed I think both of us with our energy would have started something in this case it was this but we balanced it out you know I think that's the important part it has to be a balance I mean I'll be honest there are weeks where I feel like this is all we do is retirement transformed and then there are weeks when the kids are around or we have friends in town when I feel like we don't do any of this so again it's a balance over time right so let's go to another truth if you keep working you're never going to get those years or that time back I know it's true and you never hear anyone on their deathbed say I wish I had worked longer people don't say that now there are cases where working till your death is what you're called to do I mean we recently Lost Queen Elizabeth II and now her son King Charles they have devoted themselves to lifelong service and that's that's what they do we don't to do that I don't know how long we'll do this but right now I love it I'm 65 and I could see doing it 10 or 15 years well I think what you have to remember part of the reason we work is to build the nest nest egg right the whole financial aspect so we can live this phase of our life a little untethered from routines and schedules but the reality is routines and schedules are what's going to continue to enhance this phase of so those are those are the truths about retiring early and I think it's important if you're thinking about it you know embrace your age do not think you're too young to retire Jody was 55.
I was 53 53. he keeps saying 55 and adding years no bueno you will and I was 61. I thought I'd worked till 65 or 70 but believe that there's something out there for you to do take the time to plan and build this phase I think it's important to embrace the free time that you have find opportunities that exist or that you can dig up and don't squander it live fully and listen if you enjoyed this please share with your friends and also please subscribe by clicking the Subscribe button below and finally don't forget to join our free Facebook Community it's growing every single day the link is in the notes below thank you for listening and we look forward to being with you again.Read More