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“You Make WAY Too Much Money To Be This Broke!”

[Music] brought to you by the every dooll app start budgeting for free today Joe Is With Us in Springfield Hey Joe welcome to the Ramsey Show Dave thank you for taking my call sure what's up I've been listening to you often on last couple years it hasn't a lot of things haven't soaked in but the other day you said that nobody should own a new truck unless they have a net worth of a million and they're debt free well I bought a new one earlier this year and so my question number one is should I sell that truck and downgrade get something a little bit more economical so that I can pay it off how much do you owe uh 43 no 42 and some change so 43 what's your household income 220 210 and you don't have any money no I have uh I have about 40 in the bank right now how long youve been making that kind of money oh years you're making good money why do you not have any well my wife kind of lives YOLO I kind of live like hey we might live to be 500 and it's just it's been 15 years of just kind of we've sat down and we've put budgets together and it just it it doesn't stick on one end and it does on one and uh I've just kind of learned to compromise to keep the marriage happy and uh but the marriage isn't happy man I can hear it on you it's frustrating I mean I love her to death wouldn't trade her for nothing but it's frustrating well you know when you have a divided house um you know like I hate Christmas I hate it um you know we spend $4,000 every year in Christmas and it's to people and friends and and every year we argue about it and it just gets me where I just hate Christmas you know because I know we're just going to blow a bunch of money and we shouldn't and we don't have to yeah you know you you move on you know you can either dwell on it or you can just move on and and then and then you borrowed 40,000 on a truck yeah yes well I I'm a sales guy so I have to have a truck that's less than three years old and so many miles I get paid 850 a month for my truck allowance whether you have a car payment or not that's right and that's where I would rather tuck to 850 and throw it on the house we're in a great situation on the house house is worth about six six and a quarter we're down to about 270 on it okay um Joe Joe the the truck the truck needs to be paid off or it needs to be sold but it's 10% of your problem okay the problem that's screaming at me in this conversation is you make way too much money to be this broke I agree and you guys have really got to sit down and address that you're just you're you're just a quarter no you haven't you because just not fixed what do you but what do you do I think you need if you can't if you and your wife can't sit down and dream about a future that you're willing to control yourselves for cuz you're not controlling yourselves you're you have no self-control in your household and if you the two of you can't find a house a dream in in high definition that the two of you can agree to that is worth working towards together and worth not spending everything we make to cause it to happen then you do need to sit down with a marriage counselor if that's the case often High performing High earning folks sit down and have this conversation as a math problem honey we make this much money we got to make a budget know I have one I have an Excel sheet I can show you I know you do here's what I'm telling you there's a different conversation when you sit down with your wife and you hold her hands and you say honey I can't breathe I'm so scared we make way too much money I'm working so hard and I feel like you and I are fulling pulling further and further and further apart and I love you too much to be frustrated at you all the time CU I know that's hard to live with and I love you too much for us to pretend that we're all joyful and happy once a year at Christmas and we try to throw money at our friends and family instead of being a warm safe place for them to come land would you build something different with me that's a different conversation then honey look at my spreadsheet look at this if you just would do this then we could get out of this crap one of those she's going to go to her defense and that defense is probably way older than you and that's probably been there since she was a little kid and then you go to your defense cuz she starts bombing you back and it's different when you take ownership and say I want my wife and I want a family that um I want a unific a unified front here I want a unified vision of what we're going to do and I'm scared to death I'm going to lose you the irony is is that you think by acquiescing you're creating peace and you're not that's the irony the fire is burning in the basement and it is hot it's coals yeah and because this it's eating you up and she can feel that on you and then she goes about solving that feeling with the way that her body's been solving those feelings for her whole life spending spending and trying to make people feel good about themselves and showing people how great she's doing and that's different than y'all two building a life together yeah yeah and if you guys can't sit down work that through and start to say we need to develop a new vision for our future a different plan other than just spinning our Wheels feeling like a rat in a wheel I'm scared I can't do this this is killing me I cannot live in a situation where I make a quar million dollars a year and we have nothing that is just absurd to me my brain can't do it anymore my mind can't do it my psyche my spirit can't do it anymore so we've got to develop a plan for the future that we're both willing to work towards and I want to do that with you let's start fresh FR a reset not we've got to get on a budget some but will lead you by the way to a budget and it's not a spreadsheet budget it's an every dollar budget but it'll lead you to the two of you working together to implement the plan that you have agreed to together that both of you had a vote in I love starting those conversations with I'm sorry I'm sorry I've tried to control you the way I know to control a problem I've tried to solve you I've tried to fix you I'm sorry let me tell you the truth I'm scared to death and there's a different there's a different approach there someone can enter into your space that way instead of uh having to swing back at you it's tough hope that works for you brother and then pay that truck off in the next 20 minutes um or couple months and or sell it one of the two that's um because it's you know you went and bought a truck while she went and bought Christmas I think you yeah you showed her man I think you spent more so um there you go and the 850 is coming in whether you have a truck payment or not so that doesn't justify it

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